So Eden Sank To Grief

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Nature’s first green is gold,
Her hardest hue to hold.
Her early leaf’s a flower;
But only so an hour.
Then leaf subsides to leaf.
So Eden sank to grief,
So dawn goes down to day.
Nothing gold can stay.

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Kiss Me Goodbye, I’m Defying Gravity!

Something has changed within me
Something is not the same
I’m through with playing by
The rules of someone else’s game
Too late for second-guessing
Too late to go back to sleep
It’s time to trust my instincts
Close my eyes, and leap…

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To Try and Touch the Sun…

I’m standing out in the street
The earth is moving
I feel it under my feet
And I’m still proving
That I can stand my ground
And my feet are there
Having washed my hair
To be lost before you are found
Don’t mean you’re losing…

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Died Last Night in My Dreams…

Saw all of the saints
Lock up the gates
I could not enter.
Walked into the flames
Called out your name,
But there was no answer…

And now I know my heart is a ghost town.

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Sing to Me the Song of the Stars…

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There’s a song that’s inside of my soul.
It’s the one that I’ve tried to write
over and over again.
I’m awake in the infinite cold
But You sing to me over
and over and over again…

Five-hundred-and-three days.

Thirteen hours.

Twenty-seven minutes.

Sixteen seconds.

At first, she hadn’t kept track. The knowledge that he’d be back in her arms was enough. The occasional phone call or letter in the mail sent her heart fluttering, and she knew. She knew that in time, he’d be back. There was no need.

But then the calls stopped.

She had just arrived home from work, had barely enough time to remove her shoes at the door before the car pulled into the driveway. At first, she didn’t realize what it was. At first, she didn’t understand that it was “the car.”

Two men clad in blue exited the vehicle.

It was just after five o’clock on a Tuesday when her world came to a screeching halt.

Five-hundred-and-twenty-three days ago.

Thirteen hours.

Twenty-seven minutes.

Fifty-one… Fifty-two… Fifty-three…

[Shape][Mine]
[Head][Lelutka][Stella Mesh Head (v1.6)]
[Skin][Glam Affair][Alyx (America)]
[Body][Slink][Slink Physique (v2.8)]
[Eyes][IKON][Triumph Eyes (Evening)]
[Hands][Slink][AvEnhance Hands (Casual)]
[Hair][TRUTH Hair][Louisa (Gingers)]
[Tattoo][White Widow][Moonlight (Black)]
[Dress][Zanze @ .PENUMBRA AW16 FW][Cassie Dress (Black)]
[Pose][Female 07 Pose from Gracefully Wicked “Starlight Bed”]
[Location][La Vie Sim]
[Inspiration Tune][Mandy Moore – Only Hope]

Songs I Can’t Listen To…

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Do you still sing alone
When you’re all by yourself?
Or do you switch to the next one
Sing for somebody else?
When you’re cold don’t forget
How this song kept us warm
You would dance on my bed
I would lay in your arms…

 

He left everything behind when he left her. It wasn’t that he was gone, perhaps because he wasn’t gone at all. It was everything. She could see him and feel him everywhere. The coat he left in the closet that still smelled of him, especially on cold days… His pillow, still laying untouched beside her own. Every nook and cranny, every shadow, every song that played on the radio was a reminder to her that he had been there once.

He had been there, with a smile brighter than the sun and arms so strong that she always felt safe, warm, and protected. He had been there to celebrate her victories and wipe away her tears.

She’d stopped listening long ago, afraid that one of those songs would play, and her resolve would crack, and the rest off the world would be able to see that she wasn’t as together as she liked to pretend that she was.

She’d never missed anything so much.

Sometimes, if she listened hard enough, she could still hear his voice, softer than a whisper, but as clear as though he was standing right behind her with his lips pressed to her ear.

“Don’t worry,” he’d always say, “I’ll see you again soon.”

 

[Shape][Mine]
[Head][Lelutka][Stella Mesh Head (v1.6)]
[Skin][((=alterego=)) @ .PENUMBRA AW16 FW][Runa (Chai)]
[Body][Slink][Slink Physique (v2.8)]
[Eyes][IKON][Triumph Eyes (Evening)]
[Hands][Slink][AvEnhance Hands (Casual)]
[Hair][*Argrace*][Azami (Light Brown)]
[Outfit][PRISM @ .PENUMBRA AW16 FW][Andi Warm Flannels Set by Journey (w/HUD)]
[Shoes][Glam Affair @ UBER][Marshall Peeptoe Ankle Boots (Harbor Blue)]
[Pose][Del May][Hand Kiss]
[Location][Paris Je T’aime Sim]
[Inspiration Tune][Neon Trees – Songs I Can’t Listen To]

I Would Have Stayed Up With You All Night…

 

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He smiles politely back at you
You stare politely right on through
Some sort of window to your right
As he goes left, and you stay right
Between the lines of fear and blame
You begin to wonder why you came..

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There had been many late nights like this one… Late nights that turned into early mornings fighting to stay awake, fighting the worry and the bile that threatened to choke her, and staring at the door, waiting. Lately, she felt as though she was always waiting. Waiting for him to come home. Waiting for everything to blow up in her face. Waiting for the bad news. Always waiting for the second shoe to drop, even though she’d lost the first one long ago.

The sun was peeking through the window this time before he stumbled in, undoubtedly the quietest way he knew how. It usually involved tripping over the rug, even though it hadn’t moved, nearly knocking their wedding portrait off of the wall, and then cursing loudly as he slammed the door. She’d seen the same scene so many times before that it played itself like a movie inside her head. She’d seen it so much before that this time, when the door swung open and he stood there silent, tears welling up in his eyes, she was actually taken aback for a moment before she could find her voice again.

“We… We need to talk.” She said. “Now.”

[Shape][Mine]
[Head][Lelutka][Stella Mesh Head (v1.6)]
[Skin][Glam Affair @  Collabor88][Debby Lelutka Applier (Asia)]
[Body][Slink][Slink Physique (v2.8)]
[Hands][Slink][AvEnhance Hands (Elegant)]
[Lips][Glam Affair @  Collabor88][Debby Lips (Lelutka Applier)]
[Hair][TRUTH][Priya (Ginger Pack)]
[Bracelets][[MANDALA]][Okaki Unisex Bracelets (Brown)]
[Hoodie Romper/Leggings][[Cynful] Clothing & C0.][Hoodie Romper]
[Boots][1NNOVAT1ION Design House][Chainless Boots]
[Bench][Kalopsia][Cozy Bench [PG]]
[Pose 1][from Kalopsia Cozy Bench [PG Version]][Single 3]
[Pose 2][created with Animare, modeled after DeePosed “Framed 22”]
[Location][West of the Rain Sim]
[Inspiration Tune][The Fray – How to Save a Life]