She leads me through moonlight
Only to burn me with the sun.
She’s taken my heart,
but she doesn’t know what she’s done.
So, ordinarily I’d have a little bit of flash fiction here for you, because that’s been fun and it’s part of the new format I’ve been working with on this blog, but today is going to be different, because, to put it simply, it’s just been one of those days. In a bad way, unfortunately.
I’m going to get real with you for a minute. SL is my escape from reality. Nova contains pieces of me, and the Nova that talks to you is no different than the woman behind her controlling the keyboard… With a few notable exceptions, obviously. I have curly blond hair and green eyes, for example. Nova has never been a blond in Second Life, and likely never will be. I simply can’t seem to find a skin tone that I like with a blond hair that I don’t feel makes me look like everyone else. As an aside, I usually can’t stand most ombre hairs or “unnatural” color hairs in Second Life, either. This month, however, I decided that since it had been an exceedingly unfortunate couple of weeks in RL, I was going to spoil myself in SL a bit, and I became a first-time Luxe Box subscriber…and a new fan of Moon. Hair. This is the “Chelsea Dagger” hair from this month’s Luxe Box, and after realizing that I had accidentally scheduled this post and another post a year and a few days out instead of simply a few days out, I decided to start over and play with a few of my Luxe Box items. I really like the pattern on this Zaniyah Tribal Dress from Prism, and I love this hair soooo much, so of course I put them together to see what would happen! If you’ve never gotten yourself a Luxe Box subscription… Well… You should. It was such a treat to see what was inside. Kind of like an early Christmas! And look! Aren’t I just adorable?
Really though. Sometimes, it’s the smallest things that have the biggest impact on you. This time last year, I was recovering from major surgery in RL, and I had the support of an amazing man and several others behind me (like the beautiful and lovely lady who suggested I invest in Luxe Box, for one!).
My relationship with the above-mentioned supposedly amazing man ended abruptly after I was accused of doing unscrupulous things and basically equated to the scum of the Earth. And of course, to add insult to injury, this man whom I’d spent over a year getting to know, who finally convinced me that although he knew my “ex” he didn’t believe a word out of her mouth, then threw some of those things in my face when he was angry, and told me that he never wanted to see or hear from me again.
I’ve been doing well except for the occasional “on this day” update from Facebook that seems to remind me that even in a cast I was more ambulatory this time last year than I am this year. In the last week, I have completely lost my ability to walk unaided. And then today, after I finally broke down and asked my Mother to pull my walker out of the basement, I dropped my phone, and the screen was all frozen and jacked, so I reset it.
Did you know that deleting someone’s number from your phone doesn’t remove it? I didn’t. See, on top of everything else, when I reset my stupid phone today, his number popped up at the top (because I saved it a certain way so that I wouldn’t have to scroll to find it). And you know what? That made me kind of angry. I’ve been holding a lot of that in since the whole thing exploded, and today was one of those days where I just wanted to explode everything, give the universe the bird, and call him up and tell him what an ass he was for saying the one thing to me that he knew would destroy my self-worth.
You’ll be glad to know I didn’t do any of those things.
It’s okay, though. Let’s end this rant on a positive note, shall we? I have my walker, and although I am still sitting at a level of pain that I can’t quite describe accurately, I can move around now. Sort of. And I have an appointment with new specialist number 4 on Friday. Lots of good things are coming for my store in SL, I’ve started dancing again, and I’ve got myself surrounded by people, at least in SL, who make me smile daily and remind me of my awesomeness. People who legitimately care about me… the one behind the keyboard. And if that wasn’t enough to make the day better… Just look at me. I look freakin’ adorable, yeah? Heck yeah I do.
Details below, and back to our regularly scheduled awesomeness with my next post.
[Head][Lelutka][Stella Mesh Head (v1.6)]
[Body][Slink][Slink Physique (v2.8)]
[Hands][Slink][AvEnhance Hands (Casual)]
[Lips][Zibska][Frida Lips #12]
[Eyes]IKON][Triumph Eyes (Evening)]
[Hair][Moon. Hair (from September Luxe Box)][Chelsea Dagger]
[Tattoo][-Endless Pain Tattoos-][Heart Circle Gift (from Boho Couture Fair 2015)]
[Dress][PRISM @ REVAMPED][Zaniyah Tribal Dress (w/ texture change HUD)]
[Inspiration Tune][Patrick Swayze – She’s Like the Wind]