Aren’t you something to admire, ’cause your shine is something like a mirror
And I can’t help but notice, you reflect in this heart of mine
If you ever feel alone and the glare makes me hard to find
Just know that I’m always parallel on the other side…
So… It’s truth time. Here’s the thing. I have a really bad anxiety disorder. I’ve had it for years. What this means is that my brain is going about ninety miles an hour all the time. It means I worry about things over which I have control. It means that I stress, and have trouble sleeping, and sometimes I’m a little moody, because when you have a disorder like this, it’s absolutely maddening to realize that you have little to no control over your body. You recognize that you have no control over the thing. You recognize that the thing is a silly thing that you shouldn’t worry about. And yet your mind still races and your body still hurts, and you still lose sleep over the thing because the thing exists and therefore your body, your mind, won’t let you leave the thing alone.
How I used to deal with this was avoiding all the “things” that made me nervous. Unfortunately, I discovered, this meant that I was avoiding lots of things… Including things that had once given me joy before my body went haywire and decided that even the smallest of worries was going to metastasize into some horrible monster that lived in my head.
Back in 2010, I worked for the woman behind the **Angelwing** brand. I was her head model, and often spent many hours talking to her about her creations, and about how I would love to open up my own store one day. For years, I didn’t do it. I didn’t do it because the mere thought of the anxiety that doing that thing would produce gave me anxiety. But then, finally, in November of 2015, I took a deep breath and said, “Okay. I’m going to do the thing.” I figured if the store gave me too much anxiety, I could cut my losses and move on.
But then I fell in love with it. And then, recently, I was invited to .PENUMBRA’s Spring/Summer 2016 Fashion Week, and I was so excited. Today, I got to see my summer casuals line on a runway, and it quickly became one of the proudest moments in my SL career. It was an amazing show with beautiful models and a gorgeous runway, and I was so proud. And even though the simple act of sitting there and knowing that everyone in attendance would be staring at my creations and likely judging them (as is a common thing in fashion land–I’m guilty of it, too) gave me anxiety, I still did it. And I’m so glad I did.
After the show, I walked around the retail sim to decompress and check out some of the other designers’ stalls, and I’m ashamed to say that I’ve never shopped at Entice before. I stopped in front of their stall and decided that Entice was going to be added to my list of things that are “Better Than Sliced Bread.” One of the benefits of being a blogger, I discovered, was that I was actually able to nab a few of the super cute creations that Entice has up for sale. I couldn’t make up my mind at first, but eventually settled on the Marigold Swimsuit in Chevron. I can tell you how it’s even more adorable when you’ve got it on. I can tell you the picture doesn’t do it justice. I can EVEN tell you that I’ll be as close to front row tomorrow when Entice hits the runway as I possibly can because I know how well those lovely ladies did with my stuff and I’m sure they’ll rock hers, too…
But to get the real experience, you have to try it for yourself. If you’ve never been to a .PENUMBRA event, it’s fabulous. If you’re curious, you should go. Because let’s be honest… Even though you don’t know what you’ll find, you might end up pleasantly surprised. Check it out! In the meantime, if you’re curious…
[Hands][Slink][AvEnhance Hands (Elegant)]
[Eyes]IKON][Sunrise Eyes (Azure Light)]
[Hair][::Exile::][Like Lovers Do (Marone)]
[Face][Madrid Solo][Hustle (Blush, Moles, Freckles)]
[Lips][Zibska]Plais Lips #4]
[Swimsuit][ENTICE @.PENUMBRA SS 16 FW][Marigold Swimsuit (Chevron)]
[Inspiration Tune][Justin Timberlake – Mirrors]